some thoughts about beijing traffic

So everybody's heard about how bad the traffic is here. Of course, living in the Bay Area and Washington, DC, I've been stuck in worse traffic. But I think what's striking is how fast it's gotten bad, as more and more Chinese people get rich enough to buy cars. Even three years ago we would hop in a cab and haul ass across the entire city. Now the roads seem full of cars almost 24 hours a day.

However, I am convinced that the vast majority of traffic is caused by simple bad driving. I mean, Beijing really doesn't have all that many cars, only 129 private vehicles per 1000 people, compared to 455 for the Bay Area and 338 in the New York City metro area. (I actually went out and calcuated these numbers from census data. That's how much I care about this blog.)

The problem is that Beijing drivers, especially the ones driving private cars, haven't been driving for very long. For example, I don't know why, but there is this obsession with backing into regular spots. I guess it makes it easier to pull out, but I think driving straight in and then backing out is easier overall. There's also a lot of parallel parking going on, because not many parking lots have been built and so a lot of parking is on the street (or in the bike lanes). Remember how hard it was to do this stuff when you were 16? Basically you've got a city full of 16-year-olds. Luckily in China cheap labor abounds, so there is an army of parking attendants whose main job is to shout at people about to back into somebody else's Audi.

And this all translates onto the road itself. People driving too slow, cutting people off, deciding to turn right from the left-turn lane, etc. Throw in cabbies and bus drivers, all of whom know how to drive and yet drive like maniacs, and you've got a dangerous mix.

At the same time, pedestrians just don't quite help either. Instead of waiting for the light to change, they all continously edge into the street, often forcing three lanes of traffic down to one. Just so, what? you can save five seconds when the light actually does turn green? And risk getting run over by a cement truck because there is an absolute universal disregard to stopping for a right turn on a red light? Bikers are worse, because bikes are so big. It's not unusual to see some old lady just kind of hanging out in the middle of an intersection, blocking several buses.

Durrell said that he's surprised at how many accidents he doesn't see, and I have to agree.

The Olympics Are Screwing Things Up for My World

Although I found out that I have Olympic tickets to all the Track and Field finals, I am still unhappy about what the Olympic in Beijing is doing to my way of life here in China. They seem like minor things but they are major for me. The first one that I have slow noticed is happening and complete turned my world up side down is the fact that the DVD stores are no long selling the cheap bootlegged copies that they were once selling. Because of China's crack down on the shops many of the stores are selling more expensive copies, at least many of the stores around where I live. I am sure I can still go to Sunlituan and find some bootlegs, but I am not even sure how long that will last and I can always buy from the guy standing on the corner but he doesn't live near me and I don't no much about his quality.

The second thing that I noticed and I knew was going to be a problem , but I didn't expect it so soon. Is that the bars are so crowded now. I don't know exactly if it is an Olympics influence or just because it was sunny this weekend or because there was a birthday part. But my favorite bar was so crowded and I couldn't even get on the terrace. And I am not sure if all the terraces were like this, but I am positive during the Olympics it is going to be like this. I got make sure that I found some hidden bar that no one is going to know about. But with so many people coming, I doubt that will happen.

And another thing is the visa problems that are being caused by the Olympics. It is causing so many people to have to leave, which also causing so many going away parties, and part of the reason the bars are crowded. If the government would have not changed the rules for visas, I wouldn't have to go to so many going away parties and not have to keep making new friends. It's so annoying.

I had something else to complain and ramble on about, but I forgot it. So we can stop here.

Non-Highlight of the Day: Sending Audrey to the graveyard, I am sure in some way her death has to do with the Olympics as well.

Off to the 9th or 12th Ring

Today or yesterday, depending on when I finish writing this blog, I went to the Summer Palace which is way the hell out there in Beijing, some where around like the 9th or 12th ring of Beijing. The area is shrouded in dust and the remains of giants. It looks much like what you think Beijing looked like in the old days, like in 1990. I am not talking about the Summer Palace but the area around it like the little streets adjacent to it. But besides the copious amounts of dust, that makes it seem you are in a wild wild west movie, it is a cool area. It makes you feel like you are really in China, obviously the CBD is China but doesn't feel like the China experience. Out here in the 9th ward (really like the 5th or 6th ring) it feels more like small town China, with its open area fruit and vegetable market and other misc thing market and small shops.

The Summer Palace was totally BOOK. It didn't really go inside the actually buildings of the Summer Palace but spent most the time hanging out on a pedal boat. It reminded of me being on Lake Washington in the summer time. Parts of the Summer Palace even look a little bit like Seward part except with a lot more Chinese people everywhere. There where not that many white people yet (this will probably bring even more people searching that to our blog, which brings me to another point, as more and more people use the internet or the information gatherer as I like to call it, more and more people are searching very unusual stuff to gain access to our site. I have mentioned this before, but the newest and strangest thing they are searching is "was just visiting you didn't have to do him like that," it is by far the most searched thing to get access to our site. I am not sure why someone is searching this, but if you are the one, I am sorry to inform you, we are probably not the site you are looking for), because its not quite tourist season. Anyway, hanging out on the lake at the Summer Palace is a great way to spend a sunny afternoon and the dust that blows relentlessly in that area doesn't really attack you on the lake, so its a great hang out on sunny day.

Blogs latest post reminded me of how long it takes me to put two and two together. I forgot that my Aiyi is from Sichuan and that her family might be in harms way. So, I sent her a text message, to see how her family is doing. All of them are doing okay, but she says that her house is about to cave in. So if you want to send me money to give her to help her with her problem, I will use it to pay her salary the rest of time I am here, so you can help me and her at the same time.

Highlight of the Day: The banana chocolate chip pancakes I made and hanging out on the lake.

three minutes of something

As I'm sure you've all heard by now, Monday was the first day of three days of mourning for the earthquake victims. At 2:28 there was supposed to be a nationwide three minutes of silence...except...anything with horns was supposed to blow said horn. Cars, boats, (trains and planes?). So a very loud three minutes of silence.

The result was one of my more bizarre experiences here. We went outside with thousands of other of office workers in the area, and sure enough right at 2:28 on the dot the various security guards and police around removed their hats and the cars, all of which had stopped in preparation, honked their horns. There was some speculations as to whether they could keep it up for the entire three minutes, but they did. One cab driver nearby was honking already because of all the stopped cars. Or maybe he was just overeager. Most people bowed their heads and at least a few were crying. It was strangely impressive.

Our maid, like many in the big cities in China, is from Sichuan. Her family is alright apparently, though she said their house was something, then made a kinda wobbly motion with her hand. Which probably means they've had to move out.

Sorry it's been a while since I've rapped at ya, but things have been busy in the casa de Ben. More in depth posts will be coming soon, but I thought I'd treat you to the most boring post in the history of the blog: a series of pictures of intersections in Beijing.











Those who got this far get a brief tidbit： I got a new computer today at work, but the clock was two hours fast, something I noticed but eventually forgot, until I got home and realized that I had accidentally left work almost an hour and a half early.

Tailors and Tragedies

I think my tailored made suit went pretty successful. It is not perfect by any means, if you look close you can tell that they made it kind of rushed and I am eager to see how long it holds up. But it is pretty nice for a three button suit, even though I should have took the Golzer's advice and went with a two button. I think It would have looked much better as a two button. What do you think of me trying to get my Obama on?

The total cost of the suit with two tailor made shirts (I got French cuff dress shirts and I am not quite satisfied with the result, next time I will get regular shirts or bring a shirt to copy) was a total of 1050 RMB and if goes math is right, which it is always is that's about $150 dollars depending on the exchange rate. I think that is a good deal for two shirts and suit. If you like what you see, and I mean the suit not me, (I know I like good, I love me some me) go check out the third floor of Yashou. Maybe you can find the tailor we used, I am not going to tell you which one because if people keep accidentally reading this blog and actually take my advice, they might just go and our tailor might starting raising the price on us. And that's not what this blog is intended for, it is definitely not intended to make things in China more expensive for me.

Something that I have noticed that I didn't think was the case when I was first here in 2005 is that Chinese are more willing to donate money to certain causes. Maybe I didn't notice because there was not huge disasters when I was here last time, but many people have been giving money to help with the relief, well when I say many people all the people in my office who were there when they were going around collecting money. I think maybe I am naive and this has been going on for a long time, but I am pretty sure it is a new thing that goes a long with the growing discretionary incomes When, I tried to ask about it, I got answer that did not go along with my theory so I largely ignored it. The answer was that in the last earthquake many Chinese gave what they could, but that was 1976 and the country was not nearly as prosperous as it is today. So, I will just go with my original theory no matter how wrong it is.

But speaking of things that don't change, the Chinese superstitious tradition is still alive and well. I was hearing from some of my Chinese colleagues that the Olympics partly to blame because of this. It was all in jest, but still interesting. There are people saying because the Olympics is on 8/8/08 at 8pm, the tragedies have happened because of this. Since there is four 8 there will be four tragedies, so far three have happened: the earthquake, the snowstorms, and the protest. I am interested to see what the fourth will be. So far none of the tragedies have happened in Beijing or in the North. I guess the North is next.

Highlight of the Day: Being completely wrong but still getting a home cooked dinner.

Tectonic Plates Collide

Today was very interesting to me and it reminded me that I have forgotten almost everything I have ever learned in grade school and that I am probably not smarter than a fifth grader. I say this because today there was an earthquake and I just sat there in my chair first trying to figure out why i felt a shaking my chair, then once I realized it was an earthquake, I spent the next few seconds trying to figure out how to say earthquake in Chinese. I ended up blurting out 战争(zhanzheng, war) instead of 地震 (dizhen, earthquake), man my Chinese really bad. But instead of what I have been formally trained to do a million times growing up on the West Coast (that is get under your desk) I just sat there like a dummy. And when my Chinese colleagues all began to say lets get the hell out of here. I almost followed them downstairs. I am not sure if I should have followed or not, but I opted to stay, mainly because I do know you are not supposed to take an elevator during an earthquake and I wasn't going to walk down 18 flights of stairs, so I thought it be wiser if I stayed in the building. Plus stuff can fall on your head outside, which is how I justified my stay. Anyway, the interesting part was watching everyone in my office and the surrounding offices run out their offices and start to leave the building. As me, the lone foreigner stayed in the building like an idiot. I think that they most have remembered their earthquake training better than I, considering the fact they all did the same thing and got the hell out of there.

But rumor has it that between 10pm and midnight another earthquake is going to strike Beijing between 2-6 magnitude. Which has so of my friends who have not lived in earthquake prone areas worrying. I try to tell them I have farted 6.0 earthquakes but they don't take any comfort in that. But if these are my last words, I just want to say it has been a great run and I want to leave you with this pearl of wisdom...well I couldn't think of anything clever so I guess I am just going to leave you with nothing, but know this the la duzi has been worth it most of the time, except last night. Last night it wasn't really worth it, the food was just okay.

On a brighter note, I can't wait to go to the refitting of my suit tonight.

And on a completely different note, a while back step up google analytics for our blog. It is amusing to see what people search to get directed to our blog. Right now, one of the top searches that gets our blog to show up on google is "white people in china." But here are a list of some of my favorites that gets our blog to show up:

"awesome sunglasses"
"threesome experience"
"annies dirty feet video"
"are there a lot of stairs in china"
"can you start a sentence with ironically" (I like this one, because I often do)
"China peeing"

By making this list I probably am just going to get more people to come to this blog who are searching these things.

Springtime for Mao

I guess since we made it on the NPR blog role (I must be old because I have to admit, I am a big fan of NPR), the only thing left to do is attack the big time China blogs and make them put us on their list. I think if Clark keeps up with his hard hitting journalism we will be on all the big time blog is no time. Time and Danwei you are next, it's only a matter of time before you respect my illiterate musings.

Last week, I finally arrived back to Beijing and after almost three weeks of being away. And I must say it is great to be back and a lot has changed. First, even though when I first landed I thought it was it was snowing, but for the most part that white stuff and from the trees has completely stopped, at least inside the third ring. It might still look like it is snowing out near the airport. But being back has been great excluding today and yesterday, because it has been so warm here, not warm like it is in the summer, where I hear it is unbearable hot, but warm like the spring. Spring has finally come to Beijing. Another thing that has happened, at least it seems that way to me, is that Beijing has become so much more luscious and greener. The trees are so full now, like they never new pollution existed in this city. Also, its seems like the streets are must cleaner than when I left. And the biggest changed that I have noticed is how rapidly buildings are being completed. When I left so many buildings were not as nearly on their way to completion as they are now. Certain parts of the city I didn't even notice. Even behind my apartment building looks completely different. It is amazing how fast they can throw a building up.

On another note, the Golzer seems to know more about the Beijing after a month than I do after 8. This weekend when I was hanging out with him, he took me on a fun advantage of the city. We went and got some suits and shirts made. Oh, on a side note, while we were picking out fabric for the suits and shirts there was this guy in the booth next to us talking about kicking Americans, I am not sure of the whole story, but when he can to the part about kicking the Americans he seemed really angry at whatever provoked it and very happy with the kicking of them, I mention this because like I said before Nancy Pelosi is making it hard to be an American in China, it's all your fault Nancy. We also went on a bike ride to a place called the Drum and Bell cafe, it gets to thumbs up for awesomeness and one of my new favorite spots. I really need the Golzer to show me more of the city. Last weekend was also fun because the Golzer and I tried to string some yarn across from his apartment to mine so that we could speak to each other through two tin cups, and when I say try, I mean suggested the idea and the Golzer shot me down, due to the fact there is an enormous whole in the ground between our two buildings.

Highlight of the Day: They brought back the fresh melon to the cafeteria.

welcome npr listeners!

Yes, you read that right. For some reason, we've been listed as a link on NPR.org's blog related to an upcoming broadcast of All Things Considered (big fan, here) from Chengdu. We're listed second to the blog written by the China editors for TIME magazine. It's sort of embarrassing; I mean, I'm writing about drinking all night in Hangzhou and posting videos that don't even work. Though I think we all know the real reason for such an honor: Clark's many insightful posts. Clark, don't change what you're doing. It's apparently brought us enormous success.

shanghaied once again

this past weekend was the may day holiday. we got thursday and friday off, so i decided after much deliberation to take off to shanghai, to visit my friend emily, and hangzhou, to visit middlebury kids and former teachers, etc. i got back to beijing close to midnight sunday night dirty, disheveled and a mere shell of the man i used to be. here are some highlights and deep thoughts about the trip, in no particular order:

1. those who know me well know that i refuse to either take or be a part of pictures in which people have to lean in to fit in the frame. this types of pictures are most common among college girls, usually taken in the dorm room before going out. that being said, the people in the video below clearly do not know me very well. see if you can figure out when i indicated i was actually filming them. but the video actually works on so many levels. make sure you also listen to the background, where you can hear the inimitable jefferson egging on the crowd.

UPDATE: here is a link for all the haters who can't see the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkUo4hUi1yI

2. this is a long highlight, so i will continue it here. jefferson is the nigerian owner of co-co club in hangzhou, where we spent from about 1:00AM to 5:15AM on saturday (because we were too cheap to get a hotel room). we attempted to leave around 3:00, but were easily swayed by a free bottle of absolut. jefferson decided to call me spiderman, because i was wearing a sweatshirt with the hood up, and referred to himself as superman. i didn't argue.

3. compared to beijing, the shanghai subway is much less civilized, to use the parlance of our times. people shoving to get on before anyone even gets off and the escalators are simply a mess. as all my former teachers in hangzhou mentioned, i'm much thinner than i was three years ago. that's actually because i've been adhering to a strict weight loss diet in order to sharpen my elbows, but i've yet to put them to use in beijing.

4. so the question: is a two hour flight from shanghai to beijing 4.5 times better than a 13-hour overnight hard seat train ride? yes, absolutely. especially during the holiday. upon getting on the train in beijing the car was so crowded with standing-only passengers it literally took me twenty minutes to get from one end of the car to the other where my seat was. easily one of the roughest trips of my life, second only to that yunnan sleeper bus ride i wrote about years ago (after reviewing past posts, all i said was that it was quite horrible. and it was). also, even though i had to sit next to a fat american tourist on the plane (what are the chances?), it's worth it to keep greasy college kids from sleeping on you.

trying on the local fashions. too much arm? i think i look a bit cheap

5. i spent most of my time in shanghai sleeping, but i've been there before and so didn't have much i wanted to see. shanghai is a much nicer city for strolling around in. it's way more similar to a european city than beijing, it has a more "human" scale, as architects like to say. beijing is like some freakish bizarro world for giants.

so i'm back in beijing. i finally found a place to live, though can't actually move in until next week for ridiculous visa-related issues. i didn't find that out until i moved most of my stuff over there. but luckily it's really close to durrell's place so i'm sort of living in two apartments for now. but anyway, here's a picture of my building taken from durrell's. it's the hot pink one. hell yeah.

another beautiful day in beijing

Depreciating America

Its been like a month since the last time I wrote a post and a lot has happened then. For example, I am in the US now, which is a big change from my last post. But that is just for a business trip, if you didn't get to see me while I was here, that is your fault. Anyway, the picture of above is of my super sweet new bike. I told myself that I would never ride a bike in Beijing, but obviously I changed my mind. The main reason for that is because the bike was free, although I had to spend 35 kuai for a new seat, oil change, and break lines and 10 kuai for a lock. But 45 kuai is not bad for a bike. I just need to adjust the site so its no longer at the hit for an elderly Chinese woman. Much to my surprise I have found riding a bike around Beijing is not as dangerous as I first thought (the main reason why I thought I would never get one, before the bike walking around Beijing seemed dangerous enough), it as actually a great way to see the city and explore the back streets and new areas. On a bike the city seems much smaller than I ever imagined. It doesn't talk long to get to any of the places that I normally hang out at, like Houhai or Nanluoguxiang. And now I finally understand some of the geography of the city, something that was completely lost to me, riding around in cabs. I should probably take the visit of the Golzer and get a helmet but I am too cool for that. Chicks dig brain trauma.


The picture above is of the greatest meal I have ever made. Salmon with garlic bread, paired with a nice white wine. I believe it was a German riesling, but it might have been a pinot gris. I didn't make the wine so that doesn't really matter. And for an appetizer we had fried banana fries. The meal was amazing and it is why I officially announce my retirement from cooking. Like Jordan the first two times, I am going out on the top of my game. I will never be able to cook anything that good again. I know you all are sad, but it is just time.


This is a picture of A Thousand and One Nights. The humus there is amazing and so is the belly dancing. They have three belly dancers but only one is worth watching. So if you go make sure she is there. I don't know how you are going to do that, but do it anyway. And get the humus.

On to more interesting things and thoughts that I have had. Being an American right now is not very beneficial to me. Like not at all, first, I still have to pay stupid taxes, which really pisses me off because I don't live in the country and reap none of the rewards. Second, the stupid dollar keeps depreciating and causing my wealth and buying power to depreciate with it. Third, the stupid government keeps saying stuff about Tibet and the Olympics and/or people are protesting the torch relay. The latter doesn't seem like it would be a problem but it is. I keep having to answer questions like, "Why does the rest of the world hate us?" Why does America interfere in everything?" "Why don't they leave us alone?" "What does politics have to with the Olympics, it is just sport?" "Why are you giving the evil Dali Lama a Nobel Peace Prize" "Why are Americans so stupid?" along with a myriad of other questions that have to do with politics and what America does. After getting in to a debate of what I did not intend to get in to, I have learned that it is best to say I don't know or I am not there I don't what is going on. It is impossible to have a discussion on Tibet with Chinese people because they just have a completely different view. It's not that they are brainwashed like many people think, they just have a different perspective of the world and how it should be run. And the two views don't juxtapose, they come together like caesuim and water. The best thing that happened to me, is I was riding in a bus for a conference and it was full of Chinese people who discussing how the US and other countries should not boycott, and as we are discussing this and they guy next to me is asking me question and I am telling him I have no opinion, especially after he tells me he is a member of the Communist party, we stop in front of a big screen tv as Nancy Pelosi is saying Bush should boycott the Olympics. Screw being an American, I am going to become Canadian. Everybody loves Canadians for some reason.

Speaking of which the other day, on the road I walk on to work. I saw the Chinese army practicing riot fighting stuff. It was pretty interesting. They were doing round house kicks and with those large giant shields in their hands. I won't even tell you what they were doing with their billy clubs, but Rodney King is lucky he didn't live in China.

Highlight of the Day: Being in West Virginia eating donuts. I am such a fat kid.

a pictures post

here are some pictures i've taken recently. that's it for this post, though i do want to mention something very strange i've noticed: all the paper in my office is slightly bigger than 8.5" x 11". and i mean only slightly, in that i noticed it only when i printed out some .pdf files, and at the top there was about half an inch of white space on each page. at first i thought it was just some mistake in paper selection on print options, but then i compared it to all the other handouts and whatnot i was given and noticed they were the same size. my project for next week: see if all paper in china is bigger.

the view out durrell's window. in the foreground is worker's stadium, the tall building in the background is china world trade center phase two or something, right near where i work.

the roofs of some old buildings below durrell's building. he claims they are going to be leveled to make a parking lot for the olympics then turned into phase two of his development.

the third ring road south of the CBD

unnecessary quotes? you be the judge

the seedy underground of beijing

the beijing subway is surprisingly clean and organized. nevermind that it is packed at all hours, and especially during rush hour. they are just installing ticket machines (right now you have to buy tickets from tellers, if that's the right word). so all the stations are full of machines that read "out of order." of course i didn't know that this past weekend when i wanted to put money on my subway card. so i wandered about, thinking what a coincidence it was that all the ticket machines in three different stations throughout the city were out of order.

my first exposure to the subway during rush hour was not great. it was raining, which apparently drives lots of bus riders into the subway. so i hop on at the stop near durrell's swinging pad and it's crowded but what i expected during rush hour. for those who live in washington or san francisco think of the metro or bart when they have to offload a train during rush hour. two stops later i hop off to change trains, head downstairs and encounter a truly wild scene. you know those videos of tokyo trains during rush hour, where attendants are pushing people into the cars so the doors can close? the only difference here was that it was just other people on the platform pushing people into the train. the communal spirit is strong here.

but on a normal day, and i'm going to assume, and hope, that my last two days riding the subway are normal days, things are pretty bearable. the trains in the morning are either totally packed or mostly packed. the difference is really how hard you are pressed against the people around you. the way people ride trains here is they mostly wait for people to get off (this is definitely a new development in the last three years, by the way), then rush on while people on the train who want to get off soon push toward the door. a kind of equilibrium is achieved and then the doors close, hopefully with you on the train.

the trick, i found, is to stay close to the door. the best way to do this is to make sure that you get on the train last, then at each stop do the step off to let people off and hop back on (you probably will be the only person doing this). otherwise, you run the risk of getting pushed back into the center of the train, where you may as well resign yourself to the fate of not getting off until you get to the dusty, windswept plains past the fifth ring road.

the newer train cars, which i tend to be on in the evening on the way home, have tv screens that seem to constantly show some special olympic programming. my best guess, since there is no sound, is that these shows are teaching people about the lesser known olympic events, like trampoline, mountain biking and beach volleyball, which is ever so popular among the male riders. they will show clips of competition, often with chinese athletes winning, and then pause and highlight some aspect of the court/course. for example in volleyball they would give dimensions of the ball, the height of the net and draw diagrams of players' positions. is that all really necessary? i mean, how many hard core football fans know how heavy the regulation football is?

one final thing i'll mention is that riders are by and large very polite. if you're standing near the door and they're pushing forward to try to get off, they'll actually ask "are you getting off?" perhaps the response to some government pre-olympics politeness campaign. in the us, it's more like "out of my way, i'm getting off." oh and also, my new favorite thing is on the packed trains, when it starts up suddenly is hearing from way down the car 50 people at once going "woah!" as somebody forgot to grab on and started to fall over. that is the true communist domino effect.

titles: my greatest weakness

So I'm in Beijing now. My flight was uneventful, though my reservation for a window seat was apparently more like "here's a teaser for what it would be like if you were actually reserving a seat right now, but you're not." So I ended up with an aisle. Which was nice. I sat near some guys sporting leather vests, who were in Fremont selling Bluetooth devices, gloves and something else unrelated I don't remember.

Where I'll be working.

So I've been running around getting stuff done, and spending even more money. I went to the Beijing quarantine office and waited in various lines with other foreigners (mostly Korean), to get blood drawn (fingers crossed no syphilis), an ECG, a chest X-ray and an exam. I also went to the local Public Security Bureau (PSB) station to register. I was a day later than I should have gone, so I received a less-than-stern warning in lieu of a sixty dollar fine. I opened a bank account and bought a cell phone. Apparently with the pre-paid SIM card I have, if you enter in 12593 before you dial any number, then it's only half the price to make a call. Whatever. I also met my friend Andy from summer school for lunch at a Serbian sandwich place near the embassies, followed by gelato.

The new CCTV building near my office. The sky bizarrely almost looks blue in this picture.

Things seem to have straightened out a bunch in the three years since I've been here. Maybe it's just the areas I'm in in the city, but it seems cleaner (not garbage blowing everywhere), people by and large wait in line, I don't get stared at and people aren't shocked that I can speak Chinese. Also it's not cold as hell, I'm almost over jet lag already and am staying with foreigners instead of Chinese students I can barely understand. In other words, it seems like it's gonna be a lot more pleasant in Beijing this time around.

My sweet new wallet.

"there are so many white people!"

Yellow and Purple Poodle Dogs

It's been a long time since I last wrote mainly because I have been sick for half this month with something that seemed like pneumonia's evil cousin, but since I am not a 90 year geriatric, I am pretty sure it wasn't. But today, I feel completely healthy again, except for the periodical la duzi I get, which I think will never go away, well never go away as long as I live in China and keep eating the food here.

But two Sundays, ago while I was still sick and it probably was not a good idea, because it just made me feel worse, I decide to have American day. It started out with a nice trip to McDonald's for fries and milk shakes, then off to the baseball stadium to watch the LA Dodgers play the San Diego Padres. There was only one big name major leaguer there (Andruw Jones) and that is probably why the Dodgers ended up wining. I think they one I don't even remember now. But the thing that I do remember most is that they had cheerleaders. Cheerleaders belong in baseball as much as crying belongs in baseball. The other thing they had was these really really noise plastic sticks that have only seen at basketball games. But he they were cool. It was fun hitting people with it. The game was over all pretty enjoy able and was a great start to American day. But something was really annoying, after every foul ball, maybe because baseball is new to China, they warned the public to be aware of fly balls. Every single time. And if you ever watched baseball, there can be like 5 foul balls in a row. I could understand giving the warning like during the foul ball like, watch out its coming right for you seat 5D. But Every single time was obnoxious. But after the game, we took a cab to this new American restaurant, near the new US embassy. It's called the All Star cafe and has joined my top five restaurants especially because my number one has been kicked out of the top five, namely because I saw a rat run across the floor when I was leaving the restaurant. It make me so sad, because the food is so good. But come to think of it, it could be why I have periodical la duzi. Even though I don't think I have ever gotten sick after eating there or just not noticed because la duzi happens to me at least twice a week. Anyway back to All star cafe, they have the best milk shakes in town in my opinion, thats if you can get the right girl to make them. One has no idea what they are doing, I have been there a couple times now. But the milk shakes aren't too think which is often the problem and not to runny like you find at a lot of other restaurants. They have great chicken wing sauce and its the only place in Beijing that I have seen sweet potato fries, gotta love sweet potato fries. It was a great American Day. I need to have more of those.

Last week was my first experience with a sand storm. For obvious reasons, I have never experienced one, namely I have never lived near a desert. But the sand storms in Beijing are not as I thought, It just seems like every other polluted day in Beijing, except the air taste like sand, instead of coal. I am pretty sure that the pollution is 90 percent of the reason that had the pneumonia like thing last week. I think it was just a regular cold that mutated with the pollution and tried turn in to the ninja on me and kill me. For those of you coming to Beijing to visit me or live here, the pollution is not that bad, I am just a big baby and have the immune system of a new born.

I thought I would end with this beautiful picture of a Chinese poodle looking dog. That's the dog's natural color. A combination of pollution and inbreeding makes the dog have a purple tail and yellow ears. Ahhh, Cultural differences are so interesting.

Highlight of the Day: Seeing rain for the first time in a long time. I am pretty sure Beijing is going to have water problems so because it doesn't really precipitate here. And the government finally turning off the heat in my apartment, so maybe Audrey can come back to life and not dry up to death.

The Singapore Sling

Singapore is my new second favorite city in the world, right after Vancouver, B.C and right before Seattle, I just came back from there. Granted, I have not been to that many countries or cities in the world, but regardless, it is my new favorite number two. It is absolutely everything Beijing is not right now (the picture was taken from my camera phone and does not quite capture the beauty, actually it doesn't capture the beauty at all); Singapore is warm, beautiful, luscious, clean, friendly, smells good, and is just plain wonderful. I was only there for two days but I loved it. In particularly, I loved the fact that it greenery it was clean and it was warm. The beach was also pretty flipping amazing.

They night I got to Singapore I was awestruck, I couldn't believe how nice and clean it was. After finally settling down in my amazing hotel room (that is what the video is about), I went to go get a late night meal, and then I was awestruck again. As I walked down Orchard street, I began to notice an abnormal amount of sexily dressed and copious makeup wearing women lining the street. I thought it was kind of odd considering I have heard that Singapore is kind of strict on cleanliness, so I thought these can't be rented company. But sure enough as I began to cross the street a pimp approached me. Seeing rented company on the street is not what made me awestruck again. I stayed in Hamburg, Germany and saw rented company all over the Ripperbahn (the Ripperbahn shocked me, maybe because I was young, maybe because I have never seen woman selling themselves in windows before, whatever it was it was something I could not comprehend at first). I love that word RIPPPER BAHN sounds so German. Anyway, what struck me was what happened after I finally walked around and found a place to eat. I end up going to some place called something monkey or other. I don't remember the name. I went there because I was trying to find Singaporean food because I have never had it. The place had a great strawberry banana smoothie and good chicken fettuccine. I would go back for just the smoothies if I could. Back to what awestruck me, as I was sitting at the table waiting for food, some guy asked me what I was doing in the area, but he asked in the way like what are youuuuuu doing in this area. I was like ah, I am here at this hotel and wanted something to eat. He gave me that yeah right look, and was like I am serious, what is wrong with this area? Even though I had already noticed the rented company everywhere. He was like well if you have noticed this is the area for rented company. He was like just go in that door over there and you will see. So after I finished eating I, went to inspect. What I thought was just some random building or a mall (which it probably is in the day time) was not what it seemed. It was like a mall full of rented company. I have not seen that many rented company people in one place in my life. I mean I have only seen the RIPPPPPER BAHN, but still it was a mall full of rented company. Like you could just go in and try on whatever you like. It wasn't until letter on my cab ride home talking to the tax driver that I found out rented company was legal in Singapore.

But before my cab ride out of the my number two favorite city. I went to the beach (East Coast Beach Park, I think was the name). And it was amazing. Probably not the best beach in the world, but better than all the beaches I have been to in Beijing. I loved it. Palm trees, sand, fresh fruit juice stands, good Singaporean food and those things that twinkle in the sky, for the longest time I forgot they existed. I was laying on the beach watching the sunset and all of sudden it go dark and these bright lights were in the sky that didn't move. And was like what the hell is that and there were three of them in a row. And I finally realized on, thats Orion's belt. I have seen that before, just not through the pollution in Beijing. Anyway, I am just kidding, the pollution is not that bad in Beijing, please Chinese government don't arrest me, I like it here, kind of.

Singaporean food is incredible bona fide scrumptulescentness. My favorite is the sweet not the savory, don't get them confused, fried carrot cake. It is not carrot cake in the sense westerns might think of carrot cake. It is more like the Chinese 年糕 and very very good. But my favorite was the fresh fruit juices. I have never had fresh lime juice or fresh sugar cane juice. They both get the gold star of scrumptulescentness. I know what you are thinking sugar cane's don't produce juice or sugar cane juice must be sweet as hell, well yes, sugar cane juice is sweet but not as sweet as you would think. I have had people's kool aids that tasted way sweeter. And lime juice, to my surprise not that sour. Not that sour at all. Why I thought they were sour, I don't know, but they are not. And also green apple-orange-pineapple juice is amazing. Who would have thought, not me. I need to learn more about fruit. Fruitology seems pretty important in terms of improving my tastology.

Highlight of the Day: Coming back to a warmer Beijing, but I much rather be in Singapore right now.

Beijing Live Music Scene

Last weekend was really fun. I got a chance to discover some new live music places. The first place I went to was on VD. It was One East on Third. They had an excellent VD menu by the way, they parred the wine very well with the meal. But the live music was not so great. It was just music that is nice to listen to during dinner. One I am even mentioning it I don't know. But if you like to eat and listen to music it is an okay place and a good place to take someone on VD.

The places that I did discover last weekend were the Nashville, CJW and Oriental Taipan Bar.

The Nashville, is a live music bar that plays live country and blues. I normally don't like country music, but when you hear it live, it sounds so much better. I can understand a lot better why people like it now. I am not going to say that this band that played that night was playing great country music, because I don't really know. But it played well enough.

CJW is a great place, because it seems so pretentious but in a different way than Centro. When you walk in to CJW you know it is going to be expensive and then you look at the menu and you are like yup I was right. But the band that they have playing there this month is really good. They play old school songs. And the dream is the best I heard since I been to China. But if you are going to go all the way to the Place, I suggest that you don't go just to see CJW. If I were you I would have dinner at the Ganges first. It is by far the best Indian food I have had since I have been to Beijing.

The other place I found last weekend, and probably my new second favorite place to listen to live music is Oriental Taipan Bar. The jazz trio they have playing their is as my friend said we studies music, so tight. They compose their own music and play so much in sync. It is much different than the jazz you hear at the East Shore Live Jazz Cafe. Which is often not as polished and the drummer tends to go off on his own tangents and hit the drum to hard. But the ESLJ Cafe is still my favorite place to listen to jazz. Just something about it. Maybe its the atmosphere. I learned recently the owner of the ESLJ Cafe used to play in for Cui Jian, the godfather of Chinese rock. Why that is important to not, I don't know. But the pianist is a teacher a conservatory and really good. But back to the Oriental Taipan Bar, it is great and the band plays in a little space in the back, so it has a one on one feel with you and the band. And the great part about it is they have two for one beer specials and 25 kuai wine. Probably the best deal in Beijing, in terms of real alcohol. You can always go to Pure Girl and Nanjie and drink fake alcohol and that beer that test like piss. But piss beer has its place too.

I have decided that my life has become so ordinary here in Beijing. Nothing really exciting happens to me anymore. I might as well be living in the States. I long for the days when monkeys used to attack me and people would kill birds in the classrooms I was studying in. Thus, I have decided to change the direction of the blog to inform, my main readership, mostly my friends and family who plan to visit me, mostly. About things to do in Beijing, that way when they come I can be like you read my blog, you already know what I know. So what do you want to do and I don't know is not an exceptable answer.

Highlight of the Day: Knowing that today is the last day of Spring Festival and that they can no longer set off fireworks. I am so tired of hearing them, they are incessant. The picture above is to mark the end of the Spring Festival. Because after tomorrow the tree is probably going to be taken down. Don't ask me what a X-mas tree and a reindeer have to with Spring Festival only the guardians of the tree can tell you that.

Spring Festival 2008 or 2007 (I am not quite sure what year it would be) Through Pictures

This blog will probably be in two parts but probably not. Anyway, instead of me writing a long boring blog about what I did. I am just going to use a slideshow to explain most of the things that happened, I say most because that was a week or two ago and I forgot most of the thing that happened already. Anyway just enjoy the pictures.

Exploring Beyond Nanluoguxiang

Two weeks or so ago, (I don't remember now, the events from my spring festival trip are still in my mind) I went to explore the hutongs north of nanluoguxiang. Here are some of the pictures from that event in a nice pretty slideshow (google products are so amazing).



It was a great place to visit, but the best thing about it besides the culture and interesting sights is the cafe called Siif. The place just opened last month and not many people know about it yet. I feel like it is going to get only better as it gets warmer. It has a small but quaint rooftop and the furniture is really interesting and from what I hear hand made. But from now on, what defines a good cafe from a great one, besides the atmosphere and music (Siif plays house, hip-hop, and jazz fusion), is whether or not the make a good bailey's hot chocolate. And even though it was not on the menu, the bartender made one hell of bailey's hot chocolate. But if you don't like good music, not overcrowded, relaxing, cool layout (Siif has these cool glass floors, would not advice wearing a skirt in this place) and good drinks, Siif is not the place for you. Oh and it has wifi, if you need to bring your computer there for some reason. Any, the tone of this blog is all wrong. It is not supposed to be a guide on where to go in Beijing. It is supposed to be about the me. The most important topic in the world. So future blogs will definitely be about that and slideshows, lots and lots of slideshows. Who doesn't like looking at someone else's pictures and experiences.

Highlight of the Day: Returning from my spring festival trip, more on that excursion in the next blog.

My Official Endorsement for President of the United States

I know this blog is not about US politics and I normally try to stir clear of politics in general. But once in every generation there is a person that moves you and inspires you in the hope and future of your country. It is a person that rebukes the status quo and offers a message of change and message of a world that you can believe in, a world that you want to be a part of and make better. It is a message beyond hope, but a message of a brighter future that you know can and will be achieved.

Many will say this person doesn't have enough experience or that this person cannot will because of their race or gender. But I say experience only matters if it helps you make the right decision. Experience is not a guaranteed to path to making the right choices are to even lead. Some people have inherent wisdom and know how to collect and internalize information in ways that paints a picture that others cannot see and that focus on the bigger picture. And these are the people that need to lead our country into the future. And this person has this.

Her wisdom is built on the back of the beast called adversity. This person knows what it is like to struggle and be told you cannot do it. This person is a knows what it is like to have very little and work their way up through law school and the upper reaches of society. This person has never let the people tell her that she could not achieve because of the color of her skin or because she was a women.

She is one the most brilliant and one of the most powerful speakers I have ever heard. She moves people in a way that JFK and MLK used to. She is one of the only people that I have heard that can tell a crowd that they are not good enough and still have them cheer and believe in her message. She will have the backing of a politically experience and tested husband to help guide her when she is in the white house. She is the candidate that best embodies the democratic message and best embodies the democratic party and best represents where we have been and where we are going. She is what you would get if you combined the best of Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. She is the future and the hope of the United States and that is why I am official endorsing Michelle Obama for President.

Thanks Golzer

I have been recently informed that my facts about the world are all wrong and that China is no longer the second largest country in the world. Apparently, China has given over some of its land to its neighbors to become the fourth largest country in the world. It was very gracious of them and a gesture of goodwill.

But more important yesterday, I forgot to report that I had one of the best Chinese winds I have ever had. It doesn't mean it was good, it was just the best Chinese wine I have ever had. It was a red wine and surprisingly it was kind of cold. But the win was a 1996 Greatwall. All the other Greatwalls I have tried taste like piss. I have not been very impressed at all with the Chinese wine skills.

And speaking of the fine things. Last week, I discovered a great place to listen live Jazz. It is probably my new favorite play to listen to live music. All though Cheers on Saturday is really good too. But the place is in Houhai and it is called the East Shore Live Jazz Cafe. It is like the kind of place that you feel like Miles Davis began his career at. It has a nice chill atmosphere, the perfect place to listen to old school improvised jazz. It is much different than the jazz seen at Centro and Purple Haze Bistro. It doesn't feel polished. And the band we saw was a local jazz group. It was as good as any band that I have seen play in NYC. It is definitely a place that anybody who lives in Beijing and likes jazz should go to.

The best places to listen to live music that you don't have to pay for are (except for the drinks and this is heavily bias because I like Jazz):

East Shore Live Jazz Cafe
Cheers (only on Saturday when they play Latin music, I don't know if they have music other days but maybe. probably should be something I should check out.)
Centro
Purple Haze Bistro (only on Wednesday)

Highlight of the Day: Figuring out that I am not as smart as I pretend to be and the pancakes that I ate this morning. They could have used some Vermont maple syrup but they were still good though.

Blistering Snowstorms

Recently, many people have been asking me the same question over and over again. So I thought I would address it before another person asks me. I am very grateful for all of your concern and support. I am not entirely sure if the problem is that the news is saying that China is facing a snowstorm and not actually addressing which region is being affected and/or if people just don't know where Beijing is on a map of China and/or if people don't realize that the China is the second largest country in the world (the US is the 4th largest can you guess who number three is?) and/or if people are just monkeys and don't think. But anyway, I think it has snowed maybe three times since I have been in Beijing and each time the snow was on the ground for less than 24 hours. This is kind of bad, but I didn't even know that there was a snowstorm problem in China until people started asking me if I was frozen in the snow. However, this is a good and bad thing. It is good because it should help me in my job and it is bad because I have heard from a reliable source that it is snowing very heavily in Hangzhou, the place I am going next week, so that I can participate in the world's largest mass emigration. Every hope with me that my train gets there.

I think besides that, that is the only semi-interesting thing going on in my life, well maybe that and the fact that I am going to be on CCTV in France. Actually, I might be on CCTV in France. Recently one of my friend was invited to be a star for a show on CCTV and she asked me to come along and help make her show interesting. And me being the person I am, the type to enhance any setting or situation, I gladly participated and probably stole the show and/or made it better. Once I get a copy I am sure it will be on this blog. The picture is me on an awesome ice bike. I was doing so narley tricks on it. I am hoping to make it a new X game event for 2009. And the other picture at he being speaks for itself. Well, maybe not it is a picture of a guy swimming at Houhai, where we did the interview. It also shows that there is no snowstorm here.

I have been to a couple of new cafes and restaurants. If you ever have chance to go on a date in Beijing. I suggest Metro, it is a nice intimate Italian restaurant. While the food is not that good, Annie's is by far better and probably my third favorite restaurant in Beijing, pushing Mare to number 4, the ambiance is excellent. You take a girl there and you will be guaranteed to have a happy ending to the night. And four any of you who have been to Nanluoguxiang, you will know that there are like a billion cafes there. However, the best one by far in my opinion (and my opinion is very valid because I have been to a total of maybe three cafes there) is the Sand Glass Cafe. The thing that makes this place great besides its great old rustic feel and atmosphere is that they have probably the worlds best bailey's hot chocolate. It is better than the awesom-o 3000. It seriously, probably my new favorite winter drink, it warms you well after the warmth of the cup is gone. It gets the gold star for scrumptulescentness.

Highlight of the Day: Realizing that I been fulling some of my New Years Resolutions. Well one, and that is working out once a month. I am well on my way to getting back in shape and back to good health. I hope exercise cures la duzi. Actually, the real highlight of the day was the fact that it is a nice relatively warm and pollution free day.