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Since the Olympics, China has quickly gone back to the China that I know and love. The smog has come back with a vengeance, the garbage collectors are starting to trickle back in to the city, the beggars are back out at their prime locations, and most importantly the DVD stores are slowly coming back. The DVD stores will official be all back in Oct. and I can't wait, there are so many movies I need to catch up on.

And now on to more important business. After finally usurping blogging authority from Golze after cutting his head off and absorbing all his power (really because he went to the US for three weeks and he can't do anything to me from there), I have decided to sell advertising on our blog. And the first sponsor that I have lined up is flyingcats.com, where their motto is, "you never have to worry about your cat getting stuck in a tree again." These special pets are for people who enjoy cats and birds. A flying cat is a bird and a cat rolled into one. And for those chicken wing lovers out there, cat wings also make an excellent and delightful snack, with much less fat than normal chicken wings, and cat wings are wonderful in buffalo sauce. Flyingcats.com does not refund you if your cat happens to fly away, but will clip its wings personally for you. That's flyingcats.com for all your flying cat needs.


This is not a new sponsor of our blog but I wish it was. This is by far my favor it toothpaste ever. Although I have not decided if it is racist or not. Even if it is, I would not stop using it, its too good. The translation of the toothpaste on the tube is Darlie, but that is not even close to what the actual translation should be. In Chinese it reads 黑人牙膏, which directly translates to "Black People Toothpaste." In China, a lot of people say that black people have really white teeth, therefore, the appeal of calling your toothpaste black people toothpaste. So I guess this toothpaste has been genetically engineered just for black or for people who want to teeth like black people. Either way it works for me. And the flavor is great, much better than that tea flavored toothpaste I bought by mistake. If you can get your hands on this stuff I highly recommend it, maybe I will make a business of importing it to the States.

Highlight of the Day: Knowing that I am going to get some homemade apple pie.

mooncake madness

means mid-autumn festival. yesterday was zhongqiu jie, and today is the official holiday. the name in chinesei'm not quite sure why, but it's according to the lunar calendar, which is generally a mystery to me, so i'll just roll with it. people also call it yuebing jie, or mooncake day/festival. this is probably a more accurate name because for the week prior beijing turned into a ridiculous mooncake madhouse.

a typical mooncake or two

i'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that mooncake is modeled after the full moon of zhongqiu jie. the outside is a dense and somewhat greasy cookie-type material. inside is one a variety of flavors, though i think the classic is a red bean paste, sometimes with a solid egg yolk center.

in full hallmark spirit, the mooncake industry has convinced people that giving mooncake is a social responsibility and crucial to maintaining good relationships. therefore, everybody is giving everybody mooncake. all last week were messengers with bikes piled high of the stuff. most come in fancy boxes of four or five delivered in colorful bags that produce a fairly significant amount of waste, despite government urging to reduce and go with "green packaging."

i ended up with two boxes myself. one my company gave to every employee. the other i got as a kind of bizarre reward for participating in a fire drill. my friend charley commented that giving everybody in the office a box of mooncake could be a kind of social experiment. people just went crazy for the stuff and a black market economy developed. i was out of the office one afternoon and when i came back i discovered that a coworker had traded away a whole box of mine, mostly to charley, who apparently operates on a don't-ask-don't-tell policy when dealing in mooncake.

the haagen-dazs ice cream store in my building transformed into a mooncakedispensary for the second half of last week and the ice cream mooncake proved extraordinarily popular. workers were continually shuttling in stacks of styrofoam boxes, while employees in the store made ten foot high forts out of the individual mooncake boxes. when i left work on friday night around 7:30, there was a line stretching around the building.

in general, mooncake is mostly ok. it's one of those things you only eat once a year and so when it comes around you think it's the best thing in the world. by the time the actual holiday rolls around, however, it's time for it to go.

Better Know a Chinese Restaurant: The Fightin' Hunan

Ben and Durrell recently approached me to say that, based on their years of rigorous blogging experience, they were worried for me: I was going to burn out. See, this weekly average of massively comprehensive blog posts is something all young bloggeroos go through, but it's a marathon, not a sprint. Gotta pace yourself. I was soon to become the James Dean of bloggerdom -- except I don't smoke, or wear white tees... and am not a general bad-ass. But still, their concern was heartfelt. Boys, friends know when to say when. Thank you.


So I'm going to mix it up some here, and go topical baby!

Back in the states, I would often be asked to describe authentic Chinese food and compare it to the American Chinese food we have in America. Usually, other than "it's just better," I found it hard to give firm examples. So I hope that a periodic profile of some of the local restaurants will do the speaking for me.

The other night Ben and Durrell took me to the local Hunan joint. Let me walk you through some of the items we ordered and what it's like to sit down in your average Chinese restaurant, or as they say here, just "restaurant."

Tough choices.

I've noticed that since 2005, several things have changed in the process of ordering your food at a Chinese restaurant. Similar to the encyclopedic nature of Chinese menus in the States (chicken with cashews in a brown sauce, beef with cashews in brown sauce, pork with cashews in brown sauce, chicken without cashews in brown sauce... you get the idea right?), the idea that a chef would design a prix fix of items he thought were good, or felt like cooking, simply doesn't apply here. Menu items tend to be many, and if you don't see what you're looking for they'll usually be glad to take your order off the menu. There's a definite a canon of dishes that any chef should be able to prepare, and if you're in a Hunan restaurant, and you request a Hunan dish, well that chef better be able to make it.

But if you'll notice in the picture, Ben and Durrell are looking off of a picture menu. I can't say whether this is specific to Beijing preparing for the Olympics (and the many foreign visitors), but there are more picture menus than I ever remember. Some picture menus did exist before, but generally, I remember single sheet paper menus with more than 50 items and just the dish names. No design, no decorations, no descriptions, no nothin'. But now there are decent pictures, and often pretty accurate English translations -- which leads me to believe this is Olympics related.

It also used to be that as soon as you sat down you were handed a menu and the waiter or waitress would immediately begin standing there for your order. None of this "ohh, we'll need a few more minutes." They would stand there for as long as it took you to decide. You could imagine how nerve-racking it was trying to peruse your first Chinese menu (without pictures or without English translations) while you took the gracious time of your patient waiter standing there. "What, we never learned 'Pork preparation style of the 3rd Ming emperor' in class!?!" But now, it seems the case to leave a menu at the table -- perhaps even two!! -- while you take your time to decide.

You'll also notice the old framed Mao propaganda poster in the background of the picture. Mao was from Hunan province, and the Hunanese are fiercely proud of this. I've been told that his hometown is almost unrecognizable. The entire village has become one entire Mao-related tourism industrial complex. But when you consider there are also towns in China that produce 92% of the words pants zippers, perhaps this isn't shocking. Still, it's no coincidence that this Hunan restaurant was littered with images of The Chairman.

Japanese Tofu

Another thing particular to "restaurants" here and the family-style ordering is that they bring the dishes out as they're cooked, with no apparent reason for the order of arrival. The first dish to arrive was "Japanese Tofu." It's not actually tofu, but medallions of egg custard that are fried and the resulting consistency does taste and feel a lot like tofu. Japanese tofu is not authentically Hunan per se, but the preparation with mushrooms, shredded pork, and hot peppers happens to be. It was very spicy.

A simple and healthy combination.

It is often misconceived that rice plays a large role in the authentic Chinese dining experience, like it does in the U.S. To the contrary, the Chinese think it is very weird that us Americans demand a bowl of white rice with every meal. Yes, rice does play a very large role in the Chinese diet (especially for the rural peasants), but to them the idea of ordering poor man's rice at a quality restaurant is crazy. Why waste valuable stomach space on empty starch? It'd be like us ordering Cheerios while eating out. Sure we eat them every day, but not at The Palm.

But if you are insistent, they will bring you some. In Hunan they have a special preparation method where they steam the rice right in these little clay pots stacked on top of each other.

The bok choy is a standard go to at any Chinese restaurant for some healthy greens. It is prepared with lots of garlic and a little bit of oil. An order of qing cai or "green veggies" doesn't need the preparation specified and can range from bok choy, to several spinach varieties, to rapeseed stems.

'Cause once it hits your lips, it's so good.

Finally the dish we all were waiting for arrived. We had ordered "3 Delights of Duck" or something to that effect. It arrived in this little chaffing wok. Turns out the delights of the duck were stomach, kidneys, and another unidentified entrail. The Chinese eat their animals head to toe, and I had never really acquired a taste for the stomach and entrails of other animals in China (our original Beijing roommates used to take us out and challenge us to eat bizarre stuff). But I'll be honest, this was really good. It was cooked in light vinegar sauce with tons of red hot peppers. Very good, but very spicy -- as Hunan food usually is.

So that's that. Hope you all were delighted and satisfied. Please come again.

Protest, What Protest?...I Am at the Beach

Last week, I went to Thailand and it was amazing. Apparently, during that time there was some big civil unrest going on in Bangkok, something to do with outing the Prime Minister. I didn't see any of that. But I would like thank every one who sent me text messages worrying about me, and I would like to also thank all the people who bet that I wasn't the one person who died during the protest. All the people who bet against me screw you. Please enjoy the slide show below. I don't feel like writing about my time in paradise so I will just use pictures.



I thought that Bangkok would be much more like Ong-Bak: Muay Thai Warrior and was sad to see that it wasn't even close, although, there was a shit load of tuk tuks .

Highlight of the Day: Listening to Hall & Oates and figuring out what that song was from Herbie: Fully Loaded, which is probably Lindsay Lohan's best movie.

dinking everybody i know

a couple of weeks ago, durrell and i succeeded in perhaps our greatest accomplishment since coming to china. i successfully gave him a ride on the back of my bike from q bar all the way into sanlitun, where a taxi traffic jam forced durrell to jump from my bike to the sidewalk before we crashed into a parked car. many people, most importantly the two of us, thought it couldn't be done, not least because my bike is tiny and durrell is rather large, or at least heavy.

giving somebody a ride on the back of a bike is an important skill in china. this technique seems to be most common among students and particularly in girlfriend-boyfriend situations. most bikes come fitted with a flat steel wire platform over the back wheel, which makes it easy to sit, either straddling or, if more advanced and/or in a skirt, side saddle. some people fit out their bike with a pad on the rack to make it more comfortable.

i've given a good number of people a ride here in china, and it's quite difficult. even the lightest of riders requires a good amount more effort; luckily beijing is flat--you'd never get started going up a hill. in fact, getting moving is the most difficult part. once some momentum is established, it's pretty easy to keep things going, as long as you're headed in a straight line. balance is the most important aspect, and responsibility for maintaining balance of the whole operation falls squarely on the person in back.

which has led me to the hypothesis that asian people have some innate ability in riding on the back of a bike. two white girls were less than stellar, one of which was a complete disaster. ann and chiann (both abc's) were naturals from the get-go, and i chalk durrell's success up to his quarter japanese heritage. i even gave my boss, an australian born chinese, a ride home from dinner once and he hopped right on and even rode side saddle, something other guys have been unable to do. clark is harder to explain, but i think it might have something to do with his polish blood, which is closer to the orient than either england or saxony. and also his lower center of gravity.

it was my boss that taught me the austrailian term for giving somebody a ride on the back of your bike: dinking. as in "i got durrell drunk and then dinked him."

Weekend Buddhists

Ben and I headed out Sunday morning to hike the Western Hills, an area to the far west of Beijing in the 'burbs. This region is known for its many forests, pagodas, and hiking trails. We chose Badachu Park, which according to one guidebook "has for centuries offered a heady fix to devout Buddhists, temple junkies, hiking enthusiasts and fresh air fields." Which of those categories we fit into, I'm not sure. Although Dad always said that once I finished CCD I could become a Buddhist, so perhaps we'll go with the first.

To get to the park, we first rode the Line 1 Subway to its last westernmost stop (about an hour ride). This was well beyond the farthest point that Ben had previously traveled along this line, so that was exciting in itself. Although we were still within the Beijing city limits (which tend to extend much farther in China than in the states: why Chongqing is technically the world's largest city) the feel of our urban environment when we got above ground was noticeably different. It reminded me of my travels around China outside of major cities like Beijing and Shanghai. There was a long line of taxi drivers beckoning us to use them to ferry us to different trail heads (our fancy backpacks were dead giveaways). We also got a pretty good start on the day, and there were huge crowds waiting to get into this one department store still preparing for a 9am opening. The atmosphere was frenetic, and it felt uncomfortably familiar to be the goofy white foreigner at the center of attention in amid this carnival. Well... not quite, but Ben and Durrell's neighborhood in central Beijing is not very touristy and has a heavy Expat presence. It's really nice to walk down the street in the neighborhood and not turn too many heads. I hadn't quite realized this fact until making it to western Beijing, although what am I talking about? Who wouldn't like to be a celebrity walking down the street for a day?

One thing we noticed that was interesting were these long barricades to manage lines outside the subway station. I guess that being the last stop on Line 1, many people from even farther west of the city travel every morning to subway into central Beijing. Could you imagine a 40 minute wait every morning, before you even make it INTO THE SUBWAY STATION??!!?? Bejeesus!

I've seen shorter lines at Six Flags.

From the subway station we found the public bus that leads to Badachu Park's gates -- to many taxi drivers' dismay. 1 kuai 4 mao = $0.21. Can't beat that! Entrance to the park cost 10 kuai = $1.50. Can't beat that! However, almost immediately upon entering the park, Ben was already looking for ways to escape from it. I know, right? We just got there! In all seriousness, we navigated tens of couples and families snapping stolid photos in front of a typical Chinese gate to scrutinize the park map. This is something very typical in China; to see individuals preferring to take a memorable photograph in front of the entrance sign denoting a major attraction, instead of the attraction (pagoda, vista, what have you...) itself. Oh yeah, it also has to be smileless.

This is also a red flag that you're headed deep into Chinese tourist territory, not somewhere you want to be caught behind enemy lines. Ben was simply trying to lead us to safety. We chose one of the park's paths that did not lead to the main pagoda, away from the crowds. About 20 minutes into the walk along a paved path through the woods, Ben started peeking into little dirt foot paths leading into the woods. I was a little worried -- I'm deadly allergic to poison ivy -- but I was willing to trust Ben's eaglescoutedness and any special elixers he might know for a bad case of the ivy. We headed off the paved trail onto a non-descript path. Very shortly we came across an older Chinese couple headed the other way. They tried to caution us that we were leaving Badachu Park, and that if we continued we'd enter into a non-park wooded area. We thanked them for their concern, and continued along our way. Later we surmised that the couple was trying to sneak into Badachu Park for free to join all those Chinese crowds we were avoiding. 0 kuai = $0.00. Can't beat that!

I'll give it to Ben, leaving Badachu Park was a great idea. The area we entered had many concrete paved paths leading through the hills, and only encountered a few hikers. Actually we saw more people on fancy mountain bikes, and at the top of one hill we discovered a cafe that appeared to be their destination. Most of them were laowai, but there were still a fair amount of Chinese. They were wearing those tight biking getups, and sleek areodynamic bike helmets -- which we thought was strange because surely this had to be less dangerous than Biking in downtown Beijing and no one wears a helmet down there.

Around one of the turns, we could see into a small valley with some traditional Chinese courtyard houses. This one compound had a really extensive garden in the middle of the courtyard with planted corn, sunflowers, peppers, tomatoes, and other vegetables. You can also notice a solar-powered hot water heater on the roof to the right. Ben says that these have been incredibly successful in rural China at providing cheap hot water to millions of households without adding pressure to the electricity grid. We also spied a huge black dog in the courtyard, perhaps a herding dog (though without livestock to herd, poor thing).

Go China. You're sustainability is like off the hook right now, girl.

Ben does some real estate market research in an abandoned house along the way. The red graffiti above the door reads "3 room house." I mean, you can't expect it to move in the Times's classifieds with that description alone, can you?

Given the degree of skill needed for the mostly-paved hike, it was pretty pathetic how exhausted I was at the end of the day. Probably should have packed more sustenance than just Snickers and Oreos. But hey, baby steps to getting back in shape. And what do all boys want after all that sweating and puffing? Peddies!!! Err, well, not really. But Ben and I did head back to get our hairs cut. Ben introduced me to his local place. Unfortunately it did not include the customary 40 minute head, shoulder, arm, and back massage you get before a haircut at many places in China. But for 20 kuai = $3.00, can't beat that! Ben cautioned me to be very specific in describing what I wanted, and I'm glad I did. You've always gotta be careful when you walk into a place with employees sporting haircuts that you wouldn't be caught dead in. I heard Ben use his Chinese to say "little shorter in the back than on top" (read: i'd prefer not to receive the mullet, please) and other helpful phrases -- all of which I made sure to repeat. But really it turned out to be a pretty decent haircut and I think they'll be getting my business again.

Apparently leather pants are de rigueur in this salon. My kind of place!

Lazy Beijing Sunday

Lazy Sunday, wake up in the late afternoon.
Call Golze just to see how he’s doin’.
Hello?
What up, Golz?
Yo Sima, what’s crackin’?
You thinking what I’m thinkin?
BEIJING!!
Man, it’s happenin’!

My first morning in China, I looked out the window and saw... well, not much. It was shaping up to be a pretty polluted day. Due to jet lag I was up a little before sunrise (though I'm often known to be up at that hour, preparing for a productive day), so I thought I'd give it some time. A while later I noticed the moon still out. Hey, what's up, moon! Except it wasn't the moon, it was the sun -- and I was looking straight at it. I pondered for a while whether it was any less worse for your eyes if you could painlessly stare right at it through the think Beijing smog, but then decided it would probably just be safer not to ponder that at all.

When Durrell finally rose and came into the kitchen, he immediately let go a "Holy crap that's bad! Wow!" Which made me feel so much better, because things really weren't looking that good. The following day there were some thunder storms that rolled across Beijing. Things still looked bleak, but it was raining intermittently, so it was really hard to tell, although I was able to make out some cloud definition above. On Sunday, however, the weather gods had opened the smog sluice, flushing out all that was bad, and what was left was a beautiful Beijing Sunday. Durrell's apartment has a view of the new crazy CCTV headquarters under construction in one of the city's business centers. I have before and after pictures below. The new CCTV headquarters, playfully dubbed the "pair of pants" or "pair of shorts" by the locals, is the hook-shaped building just above the Worker's Stadium (Beijing's main sports stadium before construction of the Bird's Nest).

Before...

... and after.

We first headed out to the tailor's. I had a few suits made in China during my last trip, and managed to loose all of them. One had the pants lost by the cleaners (I did not, however, decide to sue for $54 million). Another, I left sitting on the coat rack above me while riding NJ Transit and wasn't able to retrieve from lost-and-found (meaning there must be some other NJ Transit-riding bastard with my exact dimensions). Finally, the third suit miraculously had pants that fit in China yet were "1970s leisure suit tight" (if not even embarrassingly tighter) when I got back to the states. And I came back back skinniest I've been in a while, so it's not that I put on weight after having that suit made. Did they shrink from the altitude in my checked bag on the plane? REGARDLESS, it was time to have some suits made!

The tailor was located on the upper floors of the Yashow Market. For $116 I'm going to have one hand-tailored suit and two custom shirts made. Can't beat that! It was also extremely quick. An assistant first spoke with me about what style of suit I wanted made out of which materials, and started jotting a rough suit schematic on a carbon copy pad. Then the tailor was called out for the heavy lifting: measurin' me up. He worked the tape, and shouted dimensions to his assistant. In total, the process took no more than 20 minutes and we were out of there by 11am. I'm headed back in a few days to try it on and make adjustments.

After a quick dumpling lunch, we headed out for the real activity of the day: a trip to a rooftop cafe near the drum and bell towers to read and take in the nice weather. This required hoping onto the Line 2 subway (blue line in link) from out stop, Dongsi Shitiao, on the east side of the Forbidden City to Andingmen, located north of Beijing center. Line 2 follows the Second Ring Road all the way around the Forbidden city, and the Second Ring Road was laid in the remains of Beijing's ancient city walls after Mao tore them down in 1965 as part of the Great Leap Forward, an effort to modernize China. But many of Beijing's major intersections along the Second Ring Road/Line 2 Subway still retain names that have meanings from the days when the wall still existed. Men means door or gate, so Andingmen means "gate of peace and tranquility" (the same way that Tiananmen means "gate of heavenly peace"). Ok, Chinese lesson over now.

From Andingmen, we headed south into the hutong alleys and deeper into the heart of ancient Beijing. The hutong are traditional low courtyard housing that are somewhat unique to Beijing. They've been subdivided so many times over the centuries and crowded with several generational families that they now are a warren of publicly private space. We walked down some of the more public alleys, still wide enough to squeeze a car through, but could peer left and right into long narrow alleyways connecting courtyards crammed with clotheslines, cooking stove tops, and furniture.

Clark's Patrio-artistic shot of an Olympically decorated hutong alley.

An incredibly small car (perhaps meant to be bicycle powered) ditched in the hutong.

Eventually, one of of these hutong alleyways opened into a small courtyard with the Bell Tower on one end and the Drum Tower on the other. On our walk over the alleys were narrow enough, and the surrounding courtyard walls high enough that I couldn't see these two towers until we were upon them, despite their impressive size. I believe the Bell Tower was originally constructed in the 700s, although has been rebuilt after several fires, and served as Beijing's timekeeper -- a Big Ben of sorts if you will. I'm not really sure what the Drum Tower's purpose was, although it's probably a safe bargain that it involved banging on some drum.

Beijing's Bell Tower

Beijing's Drum Tower

We headed for a small establishment on the side of the courtyard that had converted a hutong household into a small bar and cafe. On the ground level, they had managed to maintain a lot of the original interior, and it had a really rustic feel. They also installed a steep staircase up to the roof where they had placed all sorts of outdoor furniture, giving it the feel of an Adirondack lake deck. We were at tree level, so we sat there sipping some iced milk teas and enjoyed the rustling breeze while reading. There clientele was part Chinese, but mostly Expat.

Ben looking interested.

That evening, we headed back to the neighborhood for some Xinjiang cuisine. Xinjiang is China's westernmost province. It is mostly desert and inhabited by Muslim minorities like the Hui and Uigyurs. Ben, Durrel, and I have each spent some time out there. It's about as far as you can get away from China geographically and culturally while still being in China. Yet these minorities have a very strong presence in Beijing and other northern Chinese cities. It may be traveled by other means, but the Silk Road is by no means dead. The Uigyurs also have some great food that's pretty different from the rest of this country's cuisine.

Ben looking interested.

We ordered some chicken kebabs (jirou tuan'r), small grilled slices of bread (mantou), and a noodle dish consisting of small flat square noodles (imagine one half of a ravioli wrapper without the filling) tossed in a tomato sauce with fried onions and peppers. The mantou (to the left in the picture underneath the chicken kebabs) came out tasting almost exactly like garlic bread -- it was really good. So there I was eating garlic flavored bread and wheat based noodles mixed with tomatoes, onions, and peppers. Add a spice, remove a spice, and it wouldn't take much imagination at all to get the Never Ending Pasta Bowl (China's top scientists are still hard at work perfecting a non-clumpy alfredo sauce). So it's pretty clear Marco Polo spent some time hangin' with the Uigyurs. The noodle dish was also served with a spoon, which I thought was kind of interesting. Spoons exist in Chinese cuisine, but are usually reserved only for soups and look like the thick mini-ladels you also see in American Chinese restaurants.

The next day I had a meeting with someone not far from Tiananmen, so I decided to pop down and see how our old friend Mao was doing (still entombed presumably). The day was also very clear, but Beijing's intense heat and humidity was beginning to creep back. I was sweating bullets. Many of the tourists were avoiding the square itself (a 90-football field sized square of baking concrete) for shade on the tree-lined avenues surrounding the area. There were also a lot of displays set up in the square commemorating the Olympics and welcoming the Paraolympics, so you didn't get as much the sense of its massive scale as I remembered. But Mao's mug was still there, sitting on Tiananmen, and so was the police/military presence.

Although clips from the Olympics (the good ones, aka the opening ceremonies and female Chinese lifters lifting inhuman amounts above their heads) are still inescapable on the streets and subways (there seems to be a jumbotron on every major hotel in my neighborhood showing footage), many of the Olympic advertisements have quickly changed over to the Paraolympics. Below you can see huge amounts of workers arranging huge amounts of flowers on what I can only assume is a newly erected (or recently adjusted) Paraolympic monument. Ben, Durrell, and I have tickets to see wheel chair rugby, and this got me a little more excited for that coming up in a week or so.

The Second Coming

Fire

Agriculture

Magna Carta

Gutenberg Press

Moon walk

iPhone


Clark's Second Blog Post

Greetings all. The second coming is upon us! For all you die hard HTSICC (WRT) readers out there, I am sorry for repeating this well known fact. But for the rest of you: I am the blog's fabled third member! I had the honor of spending the original period in China with Durrell and Ben, and thank them for their excellent blogging in the year 2005. However, for reasons too many to explain here in this humble blog, I did not post once from China. You may even be a member of the popular Facebook group "I read Clark's only blog post from China." Rather: I did not post once from China... until now.

It seems that Ben, Durrell, and I have each made our way back to China. After working for two years in New York City, I needed some cabbage dumplings and homestyle eggplant so badly that I've moved back to the old Motherland in search of work. So here I am in Beijing. The city seems vaguely familiar, yet dauntingly foreign -- as it should to a laowai of any background. I remember it as a mix of tiny bodegas tucked along tree-lined streets mixed with mega-freeways and concrete overpasses -- which it still is. However I have been trying to tally the things that I notice being different. The pollution is slightly worse than I remember. There is a noticeably increased prevalence of (correct) English translations, as you may have read the city tried to reinvent itself for the waves of Olympic tourists. This is by no means exhaustive and the list keeps growing, although the differences are subtle.

So I hope that you will 'continue' reading with us. And perhaps I will 'continue' posting. Perhaps. Until next time... this is Clark, signing off from Beijing.

A Return to Normalcy

I look sad about the Olympics but I am very happy that things in my life are going to go back to normal and I can get back to my regularly scheduled programming. What I am more excited about now that the Olympics is over is the fact that I get to see Murder Ball, half human half machines competing to the death, what could be more fun. I mean watching half humans half government sponsored freaks of nature at the Olympics was great too, but they weren't part machine, at least not on the outside. Anyway here is my Olympic recap.


As I mentioned before, the first even I got to see was boxing. Surprisingly, Olympic boxing is not as exciting as I thought it would be. Probably because they don't really go after each other like in professional boxing and also, the American boxers are pretty shitty. The highlight was definitely seeing the Ghanaian knock that dude out. Watching the one American win was also nice.


Beach volleyball is by far my new favorite Olympic sport. Whats not to like, sun, sand, and not to mention hot girls with nice bodies in bikinis? How could you not like the sport? Luckily, on this day we got to see mostly the women play and also the eventual US gold medal winners.


It was sad that the US blew it against Nigeria by getting a red card in the first two minutes of the game and then going on to lose. But it was nice to know that we watched the eventual two teams to make it to the Gold medal match. Nigeria and Argentina. Argentina won the gold.


Handball is my new favorite sport right after beach volleyball, it just doesn't have the hot chicks in bikinis, actually it doesn't have any hot chicks, but I only watched the men play. All I have to say about this is that the US needs to get a handball team because we would dominate at this sport, we could definitely beat the crepe eating Frenchies at it, and they won the gold. If you eat crepes instead of pancakes, you are just not a man. You can fact check that shit. Although crepes are delicious.


I scored some sweet tennis tickets from my boss at the least minute, even though I was supposed to see baseball with Golze. However, it was a good choice, I got to see some of the best tennis players in the world play.I got to see James Blake blow a lead he had to lose in the semi finals to Gonzalez, the two time silver medal winner. James Blake could have got silver if got his act together, there was no way he would have beat Nadel in the final. I got to see the last point of the Williamses. The Nadel versus Djokovic match was intense and great to watch. I also got to see Federer briefly, serving up aces to the American twins. And I saw most of the end of an intense four hour plus match, Sweden vs. France. It was very exciting that match and the whole day, that match and the whole day were way too long though. I was there from 4pm to almost 3am. Longer than I stay at work. The one thing I didn't like about the day is the Chinese fans booed when the two Russians in the stadium cheered for their team in the last match. I also got to see Lindsey Davenport and her partner play, but I think they ended up losing to the hot Spanish team. There were too many matches going on at the same time to watch everything. It was a little overwhelming.


I saw the lightening Bolt break the 100 meter record. Seriously the Chinese time keepers were manipulating the clock so that they could say that he broke the world record at the Beijing Olympics, or he is on some serious steriods, the kind they give elephants and humpback whales. Seriously, who breaks the world record slowing down and with a slight head wind. Considering all the previous world record holders that I remember have all been on steriods, I think it is a matter of time before he gets caught. The clock is ticking. I guess by next year they will figure out from which zoo he took the steriods. For that matter, I also think its a matter of time before they figure out that the whole Chinese national team was on steriods, even the ping pong players. Considering they almost doubled their total medal count and gold medal count from last Olympics.


Got to see a world record broken in the women's 3000 meter steeplechase. The Romanian who won was kind of hot, she could steeple my chase, you know what I am saying? Because I don't. Loud noises.


I got to see the US men sweep the 400 meters, one of the only good things the US time did right in track and field. And I got to see the Russian pole smoker break the world record in the pole vault. I definitely would let her handle my pole.


Got to see the US blow it in the women's 400 meters, I am not going to name names, but she blew it. Fast time in the world, and doesn't come to preform. Like my high school football coach used to say, when you choked, she pissed down her leg. For that matter Tyson Gay did too. So did the US shot putters. There is more on the US team pissing down there leg to come. It was also great to see Dawn Harper win the hurdles. Go Dawn. I would say Lolo Jones choked too, but she is too damn mesmerizing to say anything against her.


I got to see the Jamaican superfreak, break another world record in the 200 meters. That man is scary fast, I think he is part cheetah.


It was great to see the USA sweep the 400 meters. The US showed a lot of heart in the race especially Neville diving for the bronze. Too bad the USA men and women's 4x1 team pissed down their legs. They both by far were the biggest disappointments of the Olympics.


Semifinal Olympic boxing was much better than the qualifying boxing. I think what mostly made it better to watch is that Golze and I bet 10 kuai on each match. He ended up on top 10 kuai. Luckily, I started to pick the boxers correctly or I would have lost my shirt. 10 kuai adds up fast. It was disappointing to watch the one American in all of semifinal boxing get out boxed by the Italian. The American had so much reach too, he pissed down his leg, he shouldn't have lost.


Watched Mr. Bolt and his Jamaican cohorts break another world record in the 4x1. I am predicting that they all will have to hand back their medals. But none the less they were impressive they showed the US how you are supposed to preform in the Olympics.


Watched Sanya Richards redeem herself after a disappointing performance in the 400 meters. She had a great come back from behind run for the USA 4x4 women's team. It was also great to see the men break the Olympic record in the 4x4.


The US track team probably had the most disappointing Olympics that I have ever seen. And biggest disappointing performances go to the men and women 4x1 relay teams as I already said.

For me the best performer of the this Olympics are the steriods the Chinese athletes are using they by far out performed the steriods the US athletes are using. And the best government experiment performance went to the half man half shark Michael Phelps, there is just no way that man is human. I am pretty sure he is the brother of the Montauk Monster, the Montauk Monster was the beta version.

Highlight of the Day: Watching the superfreak video.

closing it out

the difference between the london part of the closing ceremony and the whole beijing olympic experience was even more spectacular than i thought it would be. contrast jimmy page playing "whole lotta love" with that ridiculous "i love beijing" song. and it didn't help that they followed it with that screeching classical female vocalist music. i think a little part of me dies whenever i hear that.

if we're gonna get all metaphorical up in here, this is clearly the difference between a place that has been globally culturally relevant for the past 60 years and one that is just attaining that ability but is flailing around trying to figure out how to go about it.

i'm not really sure how to fit placido domingo into that equation. or that chick's pink dress.

but jacques rogge gives it the thumbs up. i think he's just ecstatic the he gets to move on to beautiful controversy-less vancouver.

only slightly underground in beijing

if you ever go see carsick cars in concert, be sure to buy a pack or two of zhongnanhais beforehand. apparently it's tradition to throw cigarettes at the band when they perform their most popular song, named for the cigarette brand. while i can't deny the catchiness of their music, especially "zhong nan hai," i was otherwise a bit underwhelmed by the band, mostly because their stage presence was nonexistent. the bassist played the whole set with his back to the audience, and i think the drummer grew his hair long in order to hide his face from the crowd. surprising for one of the most popular rock bands in beijing.

i saw them, along with two other other bands, at a concert last night at yugong yishan. the punk band the subs played the second, and i think best, set of the night, mostly on the strength of their singer, who danced around around in boyshorts and fishnets, which really got the crowd going. the last band was joyside, and i think their music was probably the best, though at that point in the night i don't think i was in a state to appreciate it fully. all in all these were three very respectable rock bands.

yugong yishan is quite a good venue, with a solid bar and sound system, though whoever is running the lights needs a bit of work. some of the moving spotlights were aimed at the wall for a good part of the show, and otherwise flashing red and blue seemed the order of the day. and of course it was nice to do something that was happening independent of the olympics.

i think unfortunately i'm about out of bands to see, at least the popular ones. the scene here is quite small, and seems to mostly involve the same bands playing in various combinations in the few venues in the city. but at least it's still a fun and fairly cheap way to spend a weekend night, even if you've seen the band before.

keep on rocking in the free world.

another night at the wukesong ballpark

see a post here from one of my favorite blogs, written by the mcclatchey newspapers correspondent in beijing. he writes about experiences with chinese spectators in the stands at olympic events, something i talked about earlier, but in a much less coherent fashion.

i bring this up because, although i thought i was pretty much done with the olympics, somebody at work found a whole bunch of tickets to wednesday night's usa-japan baseball game. of course i wanted to go anyway, but i also thought it would be interesting to see who the chinese fans would root for, since at previous events i've seen them cheer for whatever team/athlete is playing against the us or japan. i figured they'd go for the usa, since chinese history with japan is a little thicker and more clear cut than their current relationship with the us. one of my coworkers hinted that i was right when she asked if i was from the usa then said that we would all be rooting for the usa tonight. or maybe she was just being supportive?

but surprisingly, the people around us in the bleachers at the game were rather quiet, which is the opposite of my experience in oakland, where they tend to be quite rowdy, to put it mildly. there was one chinese guy who cheered continuously for the american team throughout the game, though his repertoire was rather limited, consisting simply of shouting "U-S-A! U-S-A!" over and over.

i think there were two reasons for the subdued nature of the crowd. first of all, like in the states, the bleachers are the cheap seats. however, in olympic baseball in china, the people that are really excited about the game are all from overseas, and so want to spend (only slightly more) money to get the better seats. for example, the huge, loud japanese contingent had pretty good digs, near where we sat for the previous game. those buying cheap tickets are expats like us or locals who couldn't get/afford anything else. back home, however, the cheap seats attract the heavy drinking and heavy fighting riff-raff, which can make sitting in the bleachers quite exciting.

the second, and probably more important, reason is that the game was scoreless through ten innings with only five total hits, and therefore there was nothing to get worked up about, though there were a couple spectacular defensive plays. a's prospect trevor cahill (thanks mark for the info) pitched a solid seven innings, and i'm not sure if the japanese pitchers were good or if the american batters were just bad. but the extra-innings game allowed me to see the ridiculousness that is the 11th inning in 2008 olympic baseball. starting in the 11th, when batting each team starts off with a runner at first and second, and gets to bat in whatever order they want. which is crazy! so of course the game ended then, usa on top 4-2. (i also discovered earlier in the day that they use the slaughter (mercy) rule, after cuba beat china 17-1 in only seven innings.) however, most people had left at that point, so it actually just ended up with american and japanese fans rooting for their own teams, in the true olympic spirit. though that one guy was still going strong.

"U-S-A! U-S-A!"

More Track and Field

I have seen at least three world records, I can't wait to see more. Can the American's sweep more events? I am going to predict a sweep for the women's 100m hurdles tonight. Go Dawn Harper!!!

swept away by the olympic tidal wave

so, finally, my (first) olympics post.

boxing!

the olympic spirit is quite infectious, especially when you land tickets. going to see olympic events is a huge amount of fun, regardless of whether you have any interest in the sport. as i'm sure you've seen in durrell's previous posts, we've seen beach volleyball, boxing, and handball, and i've also seen baseball and one more night of handball. his descriptions of beach volleyball and boxing were fairly comprehensive, so i'll just leave those be. but handball definitely deserves some elaboration.

usa vs. cuba beach volleyball!

i saw four six different teams play, but both games with denmark were easily the most exciting. in the first, which is in durrell's post above, they beat russia, scoring an indirect penalty shot after time had expired. as i would learn on saturday night, this was actually quite significant, because there is no overtime and games do end in ties, one of the downsides of the sport. the game on saturday night actually did end in a tie, the highly anticipated (by me) iceland vs. denmark game. i think every dane in east asia was in the stadium, but that didn't stop iceland from making a major comeback in the end of the second half and scoring a penalty shot to tie the game with two seconds left. it was extraordinarily exciting.

the beach girls, "cheerleaders" at beach volleyball!

baseball was also great fun, but didn't quite carry the tension of the handball games, as japan summarily crushed the netherlands. japanese fans were out in full force, and cheered wildly the entire game. however, the team scored four runs in the bottom of the first and then shut out the netherlands for the rest of the game, scoring two more runs later on. the netherlands had one chance to score but lost it due to some questionable baserunning decisions. but it was great to watch some baseball on surprising cool and clear summer night.

denmark vs. russia handball action!

croatia scores on france in handball penalty shot!

a lot of cynical foreigners here have been working themselves into a frenzy over things like the lyp-synching girl and the fake fireworks and whatnot, which i think is largely bullshit, but there is one thing that has been disappointing. durrell already mentioned the favoritism shown to the cuban team by the chinese announcer (!) during the cuba vs. usa volleyball game, but i think even the exhortations for the chinese team were out of line. i can't imagine that the announcers at the 1996 atlanta olympics egged on the crowd to cheer on the american team at the expense of whoever they were playing. this isn't professional sports. but what i think was worse was the enormous support the entire chinese crowd threw behind the netherlands team at the baseball game, because they were playing japan. this wasn't even an underdog situation, as the netherlands team was generally crap, not even scrappy. i find the whole anti-japanese thing very regressive and irritating.

baseball!

sitting at the handball game on saturday night, i realized how impressive it is that china has pulled off the organizational aspects of these games. the logistics necessary to carry this all out is mind-boggling, and i think in most people's conception of china, this would seem impossible. but they've done it, and everything is going quite smoothly. i don't want to downplay all the problems--the pollution, abuse of the press, splurging on venues, crackdowns on tibetans, uighurs and dissidents--because i think these are important and the government will need to be held accountable on these issues going forward.

japanese cheering squad!

so from here on out i'm even more of a spectator. i only have tickets to boxing semifinals on friday afternoon, so otherwise i'm just another beijinger trying to live my life as the olympics go on about me. while it's fun and there's a good crowd of people here to see the games, i really can't wait for them to be over. hopefully the paraolympics will be lower key, though i'm quite excited for those since durrell, clark (!) and i scored some sweet tickets to wheelchair rugby aka quad rugby aka murderball, particularly the usa vs. canada match. canada is going down.

durrell enjoying the fuwa!

though somewhat of an aside, today i went to the national arts museum of china, which, despite being largely closed as they install the cai guoqiang exhibit that i saw in the guggenheim in march, was quite good. of particular note: a 19th century ink painter named renyi (任颐) and a contemporary painter called deng pingxiang (邓平祥, below). this is the kinda stuff i hope to do more of when beijing returns to normal in a couple weeks.

yours truly with gorky and lu xun